Momfession #738 :: I HATE Breastfeeding

While pregnant for my second child, I made the decision to breastfeed / pump for her. Not only did I want her to get that nutritious colostrum right after birth, my frugal mama heart just couldn’t justify spending hundreds of dollars a month on formula.

Well … I HATE it.

Fast forward three months. Since her birth, we have sold our home, bought a new home, moved, our toddler started at a new daycare and I have gone back to work. It’s a lot for anyone. But all of this while also breastfeeding and pumping for our infant? Having to get off of all dairy due to a milk protein sensitivity? I hate it. I am trying so hard to stick with it, but it is making me physically ill. I get nauseated every time I pump. Clogged ducts and painful let downs are my daily reality. My breasts hurt far beyond I ever imagined they would and I would really love to recoup the two plus hours a day I spend hooked up to that blasted pump.

Don’t Mom Shame Me … You Don’t Know Me.

I LOVED breastfeeding / pumping for my first child. It was empowering and amazing that I could provide all the sustenance my baby needed in his first year. It was difficult (he wouldn’t stayed latched on for more than a few minutes at a time), but I was able to exclusively pump for a year. Along the way, I donated over two thousand ounces to other moms who couldn’t breastfeed their children.

This time around? I was ready to quit almost as soon as I began. I am trying to push through, really. But some days are so chaotic that I can’t imagine continuing to do this for the next seven months. I can’t say that aloud for fear of the sanctimommies who will surely jump me for even thinking of giving my precious baby formula. But here is the thing – formula or breast, she will get the nutrition she needs and will grow up to be sassy, wonderful and sweet. As my husband recently said, she’s already a boss.

Give a mom a break … And stay in your lane.

Breast feeding / pumping is not for the faint at heart. It is a tough journey and I know a lot of moms struggle to continue – maybe they just don’t want to talk about it because they don’t want to be shamed / ostracized / judged for not LOVING it. In the end, whether I am able to push through and give her breast milk for her entire first year or I decide to stop and give her formula, that decision? It is solely mine to make. No one else’s.

The only thing you should say to any mom who has to stop, decides not to at all or chooses to stop breastfeeding at any point is: Can I get you a drink while I give the baby their bottle?

Amy Craft-Peltier
Amy was born and raised in Lafayette, LA. She attended UL Lafayette and graduated with a bachelor’s degree in Health Information Management. Amy works remotely for a healthcare company based out of Lafayette, LA. She and her husband Toby have two children - a rambunctious, loving boy and a sweet baby girl - and one dog. When she isn't working or spending time with her family, Amy enjoys quiet trips to Target, good food and, depending on the time of the day, coffee or wine.


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