This month, I will turn 33. That sentence alone is very strange to type! I can’t help but see the major differences from my twenties into my thirties. They really are two completely different experiences. I’ve had friends say to me “Oh, you just don’t care what others think once you get into your thirties!” I can’t say that has been my full experience so far. I still care what others think (recovering people pleaser here), BUT I am finding my voice and leaning into authenticity significantly more than I did in my twenties. Here is what I have learned as I enter my 33rd rotation around the sun.
Authenticity: I am learning more and more how to lean into who I am. In my twenties, I put significantly more effort into the movies I watched, the music I listened to, and the clothes I wore. Now? You can rip my skinny jeans off my cold dead body, Gen Z. I don’t care if the aesthetic of my home is not to someone else’s taste. My family and I make decisions on what fits our lifestyle. Our politics aren’t the same? Live and let live. I do not have the energy to fit into a box that no longer feels true to who I am and I’m not going to hide that truth to make others feel more comfortable.
“This life is mine alone. So I have stopped asking people for directions to places they’ve never been.”-Glennon Doyle, ‘Untamed’
Your Twenties are Idealized. The media loves to portray your twenties as the time of your life. In reality, your twenties have a lot of pressure. There is pressure to find who you are as a person, your career path, your partner, etc. The list goes on and on.
HGTV Obsession: I thought I was obsessed with HGTV in my twenties. Watch out! My love for all HGTV shows has only increased. As a homeowner, I love dreaming about ways to improve my home and adding to the wish list of our next home. It hits different when you are in the process of making your home feel more like you.
Mental Health Matters. By the time you’ve reached your thirties, you’ve gone through some trauma in your life. I no longer feel like I have a choice but to make my mental health a priority. Living my day-to-day life with intention has become a practice that helps significantly. I try to start off my mornings with meditation, prayer, and set my intention for the day. Feeling stressed? Drink a glass of water and go on a walk. Sprinkling little coping mechanisms throughout the day helps me to feel less drained.
I Realized No One Has “It” Together! For some reason when I was growing up, I thought I would have “it” all together by 25. Lol. We are all just humans on a big floating rock doing the best we can each day. Some days are better than others, but we are simply humaning and that’s ok.
Feeling Being Needed. Now that I am in my thirties and a mom, I feel the weight of being needed by so many sources. I have a deep desire to be the best wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend, and employee all the time. I didn’t feel that weight quite as hard in my twenties.
Work/Life Balance: I’m still working on this one. I think about work a lot sometimes because I genuinely care and love what I do. BUT those self-care days and vacations with my family are revitalizing. I want my kids to know that they will see a familiar face in the audience for school performances. It’s important to have a life outside of work. I’m intentionally investing in that life more in my thirties than I did in my twenties.