This Thanksgiving was one for the books, and not in a good way. My family had just returned from Disney and we were looking forward to a relaxing holiday at home. HA!
Within three days our entire household flipped upside down, complete with a broken bone, fevers for literally everyone, and my dad in the hospital. Through it all, I kept it together. After all, I’m mom, it’s my job to power through. I had lots of friends ask if there was anything I needed. “No, I’m good, but thanks.” It’s our go to mom answer. We are MOM. We don’t need anything.
For four days I did not stop.
Lysoling, feeding, pumping, medicines, doctor visits, calls to the hospital, entertaining, all of it. And I was good, we were fine, I really and truly did not think I needed anything. It was tough, but that’s mom life.
Then came a Facebook message from a friend I barely knew. She, along with other moms of a particular group, offered to bring by a care package. My initial response was the knee jerk, “oh that’s not necessary,” but she insisted. A few hours later someone was at my door with dinner, a few coloring books for my kids and wine (clearly she was heaven sent). I graciously accepted STILL thinking this was so kind but so unnecessary. After she left, my girls colored, my baby sat in his high chair eating dinner, my husband who was still sick slept, and I sat down to eat.
I. Sat. Down. To. Eat.
I ate a whole meal and then I ate more. I had no idea how hungry I was. I had no idea how badly I needed this. I needed to be fed. I needed someone to help carry us through for just a moment. I hadn’t resisted help because I was trying to be strong, I genuinely did not know I needed it. And I was oh so thankful that a few women I had only recently met could see that better than I could.
Moms, we are not superheroes. We think we are, our kids and husbands think we are, but we are not. We can’t do this alone. It’s not about pride or shame or needing to feel invincible. It’s just that so often we are so invested in taking care of our loved ones that we don’t even realize how “hungry” we are. But our pack can see. Our fellow moms can see. Who better to recognize the fog than others who have been in it before? So, accept that care package. When someone offers a helping hand, say yes, even if you don’t think you need it. Accept whatever kind of sustenance is offered and allow the village to feed your hungry soul.
