We just returned from Perdido Key, Florida for our daughter’s 4th mermaid destination birthday vacation. It was an absolutely enjoyable and wonderful time for not just her, but for myself as well. I have never really been a woman who was self-conscious of my weight because I am fairly tall 5’7 and have a somewhat athletic build …. or I might say used to be. And I have never minded having a little extra weight. Until after my daughter was born, I only lost 30 of the 50 pounds I gained during pregnancy. Then steadily put on another 30 over the course of the past 4 years. Then I became slightly self-conscious, not for wanting to get my sexy back, but knowing I need to get into shape for longevity reasons to be there to raise my child.
I had four pregnancies prior to my daughter and one pregnancy thereafter, which all ended in miscarriage, two of which were in the second trimester. Also I have had two sections – one being a Myomectomy in 2013 and the other an actual c-section for the birth of my daughter, resulting in a lot of scar tissue. Not to mention the fact that I am 53 and in pre-menopause, despite getting a regular period each month. So losing the weight has been a difficult task considering I haven’t wanted to sacrifice my precious time with my daughter counting calories or hitting the gym. So I’ve been fat, happy, and in love with my sweet baby, giving her all my attention and not particularly getting back to pre-anything.
So during our awesome vacation, I decided that I would put my swimsuit on and I would go out on that beautiful Emerald Coast Beach and enjoy every single moment. I decided that I would get in the sand and waves and enjoy my daughter without a care in the world that someone might pass and see a fat woman covered in sand. Instead, I told myself they would just see a mom on the beach enjoying the precious moments of her only child. And if they saw more or they were offended, well who cares? I will never see them again nor will they ever see me again, so it was a win-win in my mind. The battle was already won. I wasn’t going to allow those thoughts to overpower me and ruin what was the best birthday a little girl could ever ask for. The sand, the waves, the trillion seashells we collected, with her Mommy right there with her to enjoy each moment. I was able to capture it in a photo and in a video for us to cherish for many years to come. In fact, this was the best decision I could have made, and now that I am back home, I have absolutely no regrets. I feel wonderful looking at our photos knowing that my daughter had the best time ever and that I was present in mind, body, and soul.
Ladies and gentlemen, whether you are fat, skinny, short or tall, young or old, just do it. Do it for yourself, do it for the gram!!! And especially do it for your children. They are the ones who count, the ones who love you no matter how you look, even if your body is summer ready or still in winter hibernation. Take that photo, record that video, love yourself, and see yourself as your children do! As my daughter tells me all the time” “Mommy, I love you. Mommy, you are my best friend. And Mommy, you are beautiful!” These are the words spoken from a child, a four year old little human that loves me and needs me. Our children do not care, they only know that you are the greatest thing ever and they look up to you for love, affection and guidance.
Therefore, I have chosen to teach my child love, and in turn, show her love by putting that suit on and walking down to that beach, hand in hand with the love of my life, feeling proud of who I am and what I created within my self and within my daughter.