Baths are not self-care. Bubble baths are not self-care. Period.
I don’t care what someone told you about how you should take care of your self and taking a bath counts for that. Because they’re wrong. Taking a bath is self-hygiene. I mean, my kids get a bath. My husband gets a bath. Even dogs and cats get baths. I’m not sure where the idea that taking a bath or even taking a bath with bubbles is self-care because that’s nonsense to me.
It’s time to stop throwing around the term “self-care” in regards to daily life. Face masks, bubble baths, binge-eating sweets, and shopping your stress away are not healthy, productive avenues of self-care. Do these truly recharge your soul? Self-care should nurture your mind, body, and soul. As mothers, we tend to always put our self at the end of the priority list. But by choosing healthy ways to reenergize we can be fully present for our families.
Self-care will look very different for each person but I’d love to share what works for me.
Counseling
Every week or two I see my counselor. Being a mother is hard. Let’s face it, just life, in general, is hard. So having someone to talk through hard times with and learning new coping skills is a must for me. I find it helps me to fully understand the circumstances and my reactions to them. Building up my mental health is important to me.
Exercise
Do I want to be comfortable in my clothes? Always. But even more than that I love the feeling of being strong, not running out of breath when I chase my 3-year-old and the endorphins make me happy. A good sweat session with adult music is a must for my self-care.
Deep Conversation
In my toddler centered world conversation can’t lose. We have surface-level friendships with so many people we see on the day to day. A good long coffee date or even phone conversation with a close friend reminds me that I can discuss more than potty training and preschool registration.
Self Presentation
Some days I roll in with my mom bun and sweats and other days I take the time to dress well. Spending time on feeling good about my clothing choices is a way I can express my personal value and style. It reminds me that I am not lost to a never-ending cycle of legging uniforms and it makes me feel good.
Boundaries
Learning to say no to things that tax my soul has been huge for me. True self-care is about setting emotional boundaries and saying no to people in our life that drag us down into depression and despair.
Are there areas that you feel are true self-care? Is there a self-care myth that you feel is ridiculous and needs to be done away with? I’d love to hear them.