Can I Return My Christmas Gift?

Can I return my Christmas gift from my husband and children?

That sounds rude, I know, but I just can’t look at it.  

Before Christmas, I saw a video and, in the background, a robot vacuum was roaming around the house sucking up imaginary dust and I thought, I need one of those. I have three kids, a dog, and a pile of dirt in my backyard. This vacuum could help me out by picking up all the little bits that get stuck to the bottoms of my feet. Perfect, right? Yep! I thought so too. So I dropped a little hint to my mom to which she said, “You’d never be able to use that because there’s always toys and shoes and clothes on your floor. It would suck all of that up.”

I knew she was right, but a SAHM can dream about having one less chore. 

Fast forward to Christmas and I received a mack daddy Roomba vacuum that can literally suck all the shit off of my floor and I don’t even have to be home to watch it. I was excited. My hubby and kids thought they got me the perfect gift and part of me thought so too. I couldn’t wait to use it. 

We’re 3 1/2 weeks after Christmas, and the vacuum is still in the box. 

Why, you ask? Well, there are still Christmas gifts on the living room floor, right where Santa left them because I have no idea where to put them. My kiddos have taken all of their blankets and pillows off of their beds and made a fort in the playroom, and there are baskets of clean clothes that have yet to be sorted and saved. But, hey, at least they’re clean. Each day, I work on the chores that take precedence over the others but it’s never quite enough. I feel my blood boiling every time I look at the box because I know I’ll never be able to run it.

The way I see it, I have two options. 

Option 1. I could wake up every day and bust my ass trying to clear everything off the floor. I mean, that’s my goal every day anyway. If the kids throw their clothes on the floor, I could hound them to pick them up. If they build a fort with their blankets or leave their toys on the floor and don’t pick them up immediately, I could yell at them until they do it threatening that these beloved items will be sucked up by the vacuum beast.

Option 2. I could return this vacuum that is already stressing me out. It’s been staring at me for 3 weeks now, taunting me that my house isn’t even clean enough to use it. I feel the pressure it’s putting on me, forcing me to pick up after my family even more than I do now. I’m honestly exhausted thinking about this unrealistic expectation placed on both me and my kids to have literally nothing on the floor. 

I think I have to go with option 2.

I don’t need another reason to be on my kids’ butts. I don’t need an appliance telling me I’m not good enough. One day, this house will be empty and I’ll get a robot vacuum to suck up all my imaginary dust but, for now, I’ll just keep sweeping around the toys and maybe throw a few away, every now and then, when no one is looking.  


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