If you live a life married to a man that works away, you completely understand how “happily married single mom” is not an oxymoron.
You can be both! I’m both in love with my husband and alone half of the time.
Do not make the mistake that the word “single” means that I’m available to others in any way. I’m faithful to my husband in every way, regardless of him being home or away at work.
Our marriage is a good one. There’s no perfect marriage and instead of being “fire and ice,” we are undoubtedly “fire and fire,” but we also even one another out in so many ways.
Sometimes, I find it extremely hard to turn off “autopilot” and turn the “copilot” option on. Literally half of the time, my job as both a wife and as a mom is to maintain this household and to raise our children solo. When he comes home, we truthfully struggle to find the balance. It usually only takes a day or two, but there have been times that it’s truly taken us a week to find our natural groove when it comes parenting, schedules, and to be on the same page.
While he’s gone, time doesn’t stop. When he comes home, he has to catch up.
Our daughter says new words, runs a little faster, is in the next size diaper.
Our son has probably found a new movie, a new favorite snack, and has endless new things to talk about.
I’m sure to my husband, their childhood is constantly in fast-forward. He skips moments, milestones, and memories.
For me on the other hand – our life is somehow in slow-motion. Sometimes the days drag and I stare at the clock.
Hallelujah. Nap time.
Hallelujah. Bath time.
Hallelujah. Bed time.
Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.
I survive on my auto-pilot mode, and it’s truly the only way I know how to function when I’m alone with the kids. One foot after the other, one step at a time, one day at a time, one week at a time.
One hitch at a time.
I’m a (very) happily married single mom and I do whatever it takes. For my husband, for our babies, for our family. We dreamed of having this together and then we made it happen. I’ll always continue to do what’s needed of me for us.
If you’re a wife to a husband that works away, I have no magic answers. I don’t know how to automatically sync as soon as he comes back home. I don’t know how to convey the moments, milestones, and memories as clearly as if he would have been there himself. What I do know, is that the love between the two of you – husband and wife – can still be there when you both take the time to look for it.
Single only in the sense that I am one.
Happily married in every sense.
Mom every single day – alone or not.